Robert Ross

In Timothy Findley's The Wars, Robert Ross is a shy and sensitive young man from Toronto, Ontario, who is thrust into the nightmare world of World War I. Robert Ross is a thin, handsome, typical looking nineteen year old who is passionate about long distance running. The son of a successful businessman, he lives with his father, mother, and three siblings. His older sister, Rowena Ross, is born with water on the brain and is confined to a wheelchair. Robert feels a deep connection to her as an infant, often mistaking her as his mother. As he grows older, he learns of her disability and uses her as motivation. For example, at a young age "it [is] for her he [learns] to run" (7). In other words, Robert develops a very close relationship with Rowena and undoubtedly, is traumatized when she dies at the age of twenty-five. After her death, Robert and his mother develop tension as she is now certain he will enlist because he can no longer use the excuse of looking after his sister. Once Robert begins artillery training, he finds himself in a strange world. He finds that shy and sensitive boys, like himself, do not fit in with most the tough and relentless men of the army. Robert soon realizes he will have to change or be forsaken in this foreign environment. In certain aspects, Roberts reminds me of Scooby-Doo. Scooby-Doo constantly finds himself in frightening situations, much like Robert and The Great War. In addition, neither of them would like to be part of the solution and would rather see others take care of things. However, they both understand it is their duty and bravely offer their help, even if it puts themselves in danger. Furthermore, its obvious both of them are more than capable runners. Nevertheless, Robert is a very relatable and realistic character. I, like Robert, could never image having to kill anything, human or animal. I imagine the fear and anxiety he must feel to be tremendously agonizing. It was not uncommon for young men, like Robert, to feel pressure to enlist and forced into the unforgiving world of World War I. These are just a few of the reasons why I believe Robert Ross is a relatable and realistic character. 

To My Greatest Source of Happiness

Dear Grandma,
You do so much for our whole family and rarely does anyone take the time to thank you for all the work you do. For as long as I can remember, you've been there to help me. When I was younger, you were there when I was little and needed a snack when my mom an dad weren't around, you never hesitated to help me with my weekly spelling words, and most of all, you always made sure I was happy even if it meant doing something you didn't want to do. At times we have had disagreements, like when my friends and I wanted to do flips off the trampoline on to the ground, and you didn't let us. Even though I still think we would have been fine, you were just looking out for us just in case we were not quite the acrobats we thought we were. Besides, it's these endearing qualities that make you who you are; a cautious, worrisome, loving grandmother who would never let her grandson hurt himself. Consequently, I am starting to develop many of the same qualities. Even though I am getting older and we see each other less and less, you continue to do little things to ensure my happiness. For example, you occasionally leave a couple Loonies on my desk to ensure I have bus fare, you always make sure I have something to eat when I get home from school, you tell me how proud of me you are, and I always sleep best when you make my bed. I wish you could stay by my side and see me shape into the adult you helped mold and possibly even teach me your bed making secrets. Unfortunately, we both know this dream could never be reality. Thus why I am sending you this Valentine, so you know that even as I grow older and am forced to spend Valentine's day without you, I will never forget you and all the wonderful things you did for me. However, in return you must promise to always remember that I am eternally grateful and will always love you. Happy Valentine's day grandma!

The Turn Around

We were inside a dimly lit gym. Whistles and other players shouting made it almost made it almost impossible to hear yourself think. I almost did not hear my coach tell me it was time for me to enter the game. As I stepped on to the volleyball court, my teammates sighed, the players on the bench lost hope; the other team knew they were one step closer to victory simply because of one weak player, me. I cost us the first few points and immediately sunk into a mental state that brought the whole team down. I did not want to do this anymore. Sometimes in life, the greatest challenges we face in life are with ourselves.

After the season that had been riddled with mistakes, horrible plays, and me, always standing on the court with a look of sadness, I wanted to quit. My friend begged me to give myself a chance. I wanted no part of it, I hated the game, I hated the team, and I hated myself when I was on the court. My friend told me I had two problems, first of all, I had to work on my skills, secondly, I had to have confidence and not get down on myself when mistakes are made. I thought about what he had said for a few days. I decided to give it a shot.

My journey to reinventing myself as a player began at the Baden Cup tryouts. Baden Cup is a volleyball camp held each summer by the best coaches in British Columbia. As I arrived in the massive gymnasium, I almost trembled with fear as I realized I would have to play against these players, who seemed to be as tall as mountains, who were the best players in the province. Suddenly, I felt sick. The realization that I would be playing with and against these players hit me harder than a punch to the gut from a professional boxer. Butterflies filled my stomach, and negative thoughts raced through my head faster than a drag racer. I wanted to pack my things and just walk out the door and never have to face my fear. Then, I saw the friend who convinced me to give myself a chance and I forced myself, unwillingly, to be positive. I told myself to go out there and just try to have fun. The tryouts were about to begin, nervous thoughts began racing through my head, I feared I would just make a fool of myself. Fortunately, the tryouts began before I had the chance to contemplate leaving. The first few drills the coaches had us do were quite simple; I performed well. As the day progressed, so did my confidence. When we were given a break for lunch I typically began to doubt myself, but after an encouraging conversation with a few other players, I assured myself I had played well enough to earn a spot at the camp.

The second half was to be composed only of games. After a while, the tension and sadness that others had been accustomed to seeing on my face was gone, I was smiling. I was having fun again. At the end of the day, my hopes had been realized as I had been chosen to participate at the summer camp.

At the camp, I took the last few steps to the halfway point of my journey. I received fantastic coaching and my skills improved. I now had one half of  the assets I needed to become an elite player.

The second stage of the journey was to improve my self confidence and attitude on the court. This obstacle would have to tackled during the school volleyball season. I concluded that to improve my self confidence, I would have to enter an environment in which I was not already comfortable. For this reason, I decided not to tryout for my grade's team, but the senior team. They had been champions of Richmond the previous year. At the first try out, they were all having fun, reminiscing their championship. My throat felt as if it was in the midst of the drought of the 1930s, my palms were sweaty, and I felt embarrassed for even thinking about making this team. Just like at the Baden Cup tryouts, I would have to overcome these feelings, relax, and play my best. At the end of the tryout, I was critical of myself; I did not play my best.

That night, I could not focus on homework, eating, or talking to my parents, even watching t.v. was impossible. Obviously, sleeping that night was going to be an issue. I tried to close my eyes and drift into a distant dream; it was not going to happen. Each time slumber crept up on me, thoughts regarding the tryouts and my performance shot into my head like bullets. It was a long night as the gun shots refused to cease.

The next morning, at school, my friends wasted no time telling me I looked like a zombie. I told them about my trouble sleeping the night before. Then, I learned the team would be announced at lunch. The first classes of the day seemed to last an eternity. I managed to get through them with every word spoken by teachers and classmates peacefully passing by my ears not entering the battle taking place in my mind. Finally, lunch time. I raced to the board where the team list would be posted. Success. Finally peace was achieved in my mind. My name was part of the list.

Although we had limited team success during the season, I had changed. I had the skills, I was enjoying every minute of every game, I wanted the ball to come to me, I loved being there. I was no longer the target for the opposition's serves and my team wanted me to get the ball. I had confidence and the right attitude, these roadblocks had been destroyed and the end of the journey was in sight.

The final leg of the journey was pulling all these things together and playing well for my club team.

During the provincial championships, in a huge building, with more noise than an elephant on a jump rope, I had my opportunity. With the game on the line, all of our parents in the stands were holding their breath, there were no substitutions this time. I was already on the court, focused on the game. My teammates on the bench were filled with hope, cheering us on, anticipating a win. As I looked at our opponents, it was like looking into the past and seeing myself last year. We made them feel down and not confident as a loss was upon them. I, on the other hand, was confident and enjoying the game. I had become an elite player and leader on my team. I was even given the captaincy. I had become the player I wanted to be. The journey was over.

I wanted to give up on myself multiple times, but I fought myself and forced myself to be positive and continually fight off negativity. As a result, I became better than I could have ever imagined. It was not easy as I had to overcome several obstacles, but I overcame all of them including the largest one; myself.